NEWS JULY 29 2003

 

COMMITMENTS

Ryann Horseman, P,OF, currently So Cal Athletics, verballed to Univ of Nevada-Reno.

 

GOOD NEWS FROM UNSIGNED SENIORS

Readers will recall that, when we proposed a new list of unsigned 2003 seniors, our priority was for those players who have not been heavily recruited – overlooked would also apply.  In the last few days, we have heard from some of those players we named, and they are very grateful for the calls they’ve been getting, and, in at least two instances, for scholarship offers they’ve received.  However many functions SPY may perform, its primary purpose will always be to promote the interests of the girls who play our sport.

 

REGION 4

ASA’S Karen Weisman explained today how the Colorado Stars got the berth which Region 4 failed to award (even though the ASA web site and the ASA Code made very clear there were two berths, not one, to be competed).  Under the Code, when a region fails to compete a berth, that berth does to the sector, in this case Sector 1.  However, both Sector 1 tournaments had been completed, so the berth was awarded to the next highest ranking team which competed in Sector 1 – which was the CO Stars.

 

AND, WHAT’S IN YOUR EMAIL?

Earlier this year, I was asked if I knew how to obtain false identity papers – Social Security, birth certificate, etc – for an illegal alien who has worked here for a decade but conveniently never paid income tax, etc.  I know how it’s done, but, given my past position, it is actually a felony to ask me.

 

Today, I got a sorrowful plea from a widow whose husband was part of the ruling clique in Cote d‘Ivoire who allegedly moved $10 million to Togo before he was killed in a coup.  The widow is now in Lome ’.  She assumes I know how to move that much money – quietly – and offered me a cut.  I also know how this could be done, but my senses tell me this is a variation on the Nigerian scams we’ve seen for years.  Not that I would remotely consider becoming involved for legal, ethical and moral reasons, but I have spent some time in Cote d’Ivoire , where it is not uncommon for certain body parts to be removed as part of the interrogation process.  Places like Cote d’Ivoire , Guineau , Togo , Nigeria , Senegal , and Cameroon , among several African states I have frequented, make Bed-Sty, the South Bronix , etc. look like the Golden City of Eldorado.

 

THE AUSTRALIANS V THE STORM

Thanks to Alan Usher, we finally got some details on the games ten days ago pitting two JO teams against the Australian national team.  Alan’s report:

 

The Storm and the Strikkers each had a practice game against the Australian
National team on Saturday July 19th at bayside park in
Burlingame .  The
Strikkers lost the first game 1-0. I did not watch the entire game so I
don't think I should provide any specific details of the game.

The Storm lost the second game 2-0.  Monica Abbott pitched the first 5
innings giving up 1 unearned run while striking out 10 of the 17 hitters she
faced.  The lone run against her was scored when Simmone Morrow singled to
right and stole second base with one out in the fifth inning.  Monica then
struck out the next hitter for the second out and Fiona Hanes-Crawford
singled to right field where right fielder Jennifer Chamberlin threw a
strike to home plate to allow catcher Amy Baxter to tag out the runner
trying to score from second by 15 feet.  The umpires unfortunately called
interference on the Storm third baseman allowing the run to count.  Monica
gave way to pick up player Danika Dukes of the RR Gold in the sixth inning. 
Danika walked four batters in a row after two outs in the inning to allow
the second run to cross the plate before getting the third out on a fly to
left fielder Lauren Schmitz. Danika retired the side in order in the seventh
inning.

The Storm was held to two hits by pitcher Kelly Gentle.  Both hits came in
the 5th inning which ended with pinch runner Cat Belanger stranded at third
base following hits by Jennifer Olvera and Virginia Fritsch.  End

 

A PRAYER FOR CHRISTIE BYRGE

Jackie Crockett sent us this email about Christie, daughter of ASA coach Mel Byrge of Tucson :

 

Dear softball friends,
Christie Byrge was in a very bad car accident today and is in the  hospital with brain damage.  Sue Robinson told me the next 24 hours will determine how Christie will do, and she will let me know.  I'm sorry to bear such bad news, but I thought you'd rather know.

Christie is at UMC, and Sue was with Joanne when I spoke with her.  I am uncertain what we can do, but I know it will help to pray for her. Jackie

 

Readers: your prayers are earnestly sought – and appreciated.

 

THE MAIL BAG

Our readers are writing to ESPN as requested; we’ve seen some of the correspondence.  Thanks, people.

 

We also received comments about Bob Hope, from readers whose fathers, grandfathers, etc., were serving in the military during various wars and got to see Bob perform on his various USO tours.  One man video-taped the event; his family considers the tape one of the family treasures.  Another wrote that her father-sailor considered seeing Hope the highlight of the war for him.

 

WHY I HATE TO FLY

SeaTac was bad, in a class with Lagos , Nigeria ; Luanda ; Dakar ; Sofia ; Istanbul .  I asked the girl at United if I could change seats; she bluntly told me to sit where I was told, and, if I didn’t like it, I could give up all my United frequent flyer miles to other customers.  When I got to the security zone, this woman with such prominent shoulder blades I thought she was turned backward, screamed at me because I changed lanes; I was behind an unmoving crowd and another lane was empty.  So I got questioned whether I was trying to sneak by with something, which prompted a search of all my gear.  Then, Quasimodo’s idiot grandson ordered me to take my shoes off, which left me barefoot.  I as then ordered to a chair, which required that I walk across a small carpet – which briefly created a minor electrostatic field.  Q-ball waved his wand across my feet and got a buzzing sound.  Aha.  What metal did I have concealed in my feet?  I was mentally calculating all the really horrible methods of torture I knew about when a supervisor came over and took over my security check.  SeaTac and BWI are experiments in negative management by goofballs who could not pass the civil service test.

 

Dallas-Ft Worth and American went on the list today.  Ever notice how the pretty young stewardesses you see on the concourses dragging their carryons never seem to be on your flight?  American actually had a Gwyneth Paltrow type on the flight down from Dulles.  Good start for my 14-day trip.  But, when we boarded the plane for the flight to Oklahoma City – a plane which had been at DFW for more than an hour – some ground tech discovered that the door to the toilet in first class would not lock.  People were sent to look for a replacement.  An hour passed.  The pilot announced that Federal regulations required working locks on all toilets, so that a passenger would not get trapped in the toilet.  Too much!  I told the pilot there was an alternative: tape the damned door shut, don’t let anybody inside, and you’ve eliminated the risk of being trapped.  But, taping the door shut meant that the eight first class passengers would have to share tush time with all the peons.  Finally, after two hours, a mechanic stole the lock off another 737.  I had visions of a succession of 737s being delayed on the ground while toilet locks were pilfered, installed, pilfered and so on.

 

What made the wait more unbearable was the somewhat chubby lady sitting next to me.  She spent the entire wait, calling friends and relatives, telling them about her trip back home – and bawling her eyes out as she recalled all the good things she and her mother used to do.  Being a Southern gentleman, I waited for a break in the calls, offered my sympathies, and asked if her mother had just passed away.  No, she died 14 years ago.  The woman apparently got unnerved by going home.  To compound the problem, she pulled out a box, unearthed a bottle of eau d’muskrat and enveloped two rows in a cloud of spray.  I am deepening my resolve to drive half-way across country for the Majors tournament in Pekin – just to avoid airports and airplanes.  More on this later.

 

End

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